GOD AWFUL

In the wake of the colossal failure that was asking for a writing partner on Tumblr, I now ask for a nemesis.

You’re required to like a lot of what I like but act like you appreciate it on a much deeper level, which you obviously don’t. You can’t, but you don’t know that. Bastard.

It would also help if you write sketches and screenplays that are roughly as good as, or slightly better than my own. It is also vital that we get a similar amount of praise.

Lastly, if you could like the same girl as me that would really help. I’ll need you to be slightly better or slightly worse looking than me. Thats very important. If you’re worse looking, I will be justifiably indignant about our romantic rivalry. If you’re better looking, I can be jealous and take the scrappy underdog position. I don’t work too well in that role, but people will probably support me slightly more.

All interested parties should let me know who they are on Twitter @mikecomplains, at which point I will immediately start trying to find pictures of you on the internet so I can show you to my friends and we can all talk about how you’re shit, you douche.

Jack Manos is one tough cop, but when his hand is severed while chasing a perp through the New York subway, his life will change forever.

Fearing this may be the end, Jack quits the force and retires to South Jersey. It is there that he learns of a special gift. God has spoken to his severed hand and sent it back to Jack as a ghost. With its help, Jack runs a successful roadside produce stand. 

Its only when his former Lieutenant shows up at his front door and asks for help catching the criminal that got away does Jack ever consider using the lucky hand he’s been dealt

The criminal that got away that day turns out a hired thug who works for an time traveling eccentric millionaire steampunk ghost hunter being investigated for fraud. Angry with the city over his business practices being questioned, he unleashes hell on the people of New York with his ghost army.

Only Jack Manos and his spirit hand know the way to defeat him, can he handle the task at hand?

Story by Michael Johnson and Brian Sullivan. 

Jack Pauerblits is…POWERBLITZ

In a world where parkour is king, one man stood above all others until he developed skills that LITERALLY kill.

Forced into retirement, Jack Pauerblits will be called into ACTION one last time. 

Somali pirates control the worlds major trade routes and with all their money hold life or death parkour tournaments. A rumor is started that Jack Pauerblits will be competing. When he announces he isn’t, all the gamblers threaten to take back their money which would cripple the Somali pirates betting arm, a vital cog in their cash machine.

When Pauerblits tells the Somalis that he won’t be competing his girlfriend is taken hostage and he is forced with a decision, let his girlfriend die or kill the thousands in attendance with his parkour skills?